…wait. it’s been so long i didn’t follow my own format.
well. i guess i’m ok with that. i think. maybe not.
i was realizing that i don’t write here much anymore because …because maybe it’s been so long it feels a bit insurmountable. maybe that’s part of it.
and then i was thinking. who really cares. i mean, yet another venue to take one’s stuff public. we fb (mostly against our will, but so it goes) and tweet (occasionally, actually almost never. i’m not clever enough for the one line zingers) and instagram (which i kind of LOVE, but damnitall if once i get the hang of something, it’s over now with fb in there mucking around), i think i’m getting the hang of tumblr (i can see how that is the perfect marriage of the succinct with the expoundable) — how necessary is this blog. not very. not very necessary at ALL. which i’m not clear on. i mean. i’m not clear on how i feel about that. i like sharing and seeing and we create and that needs to be shared. and i enjoy promoting our creations and talking about this and that and giving it the old college try, you know?
and then sometimes just the need to be clear and concise is deterrent enough from starting any …any dialog. sometimes it just feels too hard to me to focus and edit and and
i used to love to write here. i gave it time and attention, and at the same time, didn’t require too much of it. you know. too much before i sat down to write. a loose goal. well. just now i sat down with a concrete purpose and almost gave up. it’s too clogging i think sometimes. there’s lots of places for that. so this. this will be different.
rambling and incohesive and brainstormy streamofconciousy and might make sense and might not. i think. or maybe it will. sometimes. i guess whatever the mood is. i guess. and i’m not sure it’s worth reading one way or another. i mean. hmmm. why do it. why why . the act of writing. a public diary? now. that seems unnecessary. … i guess i won’t think about that too much because it does feel good to write. without direction.
so i finished these rings yesterday or maybe the day before. and i love them. they’re made for another, tho. and she picked an amazing piece of writing. in my opinion. and i’ve spent many hours with this passage now… reading and rewriting several times in my own hand before decisively stamping it into sterling silver. the sterling commitment and intention. into the strenuous briefness. with all the daily quickness and concreteness and clarity it was lovely to let my brain play in the thicker, subtler, foggier, innuendo-ed places and spaces where you’re not so lead all the time, to what someone means for you to thinkfeelassimilate.
i’m very amped for this line. it’s been a long time coming. lots of ideas spinning in my head and even managing to write some of them down. i need to get better at that. because clarity…if fleeting. at any rate.
p.s. just in case you’re still here. this is my favorite website ever. i found it way way way back in 1997 or something like that. i haven’t looked at it in forEVER and lo and behold, it’s still there. i thought this was the way the whole internet was supposed to be. for a long time. even used to design our websites based on this. with lots of hidden things and i thought it was great but turns out it really frustrates people looking for …well. looking for whatever they’re trying to find on your site. which again, i thought was the point. but apparently it’s not. at any rate.